AMERICAN IN ARABIA Asks About Assad's Second Lady
Girl on the Assad
Just when we thought he couldn’t get any sleazier, the Lion of Syria throws us one more gnarly bone from his shady den. This one hit Asma, his unconditionally loyal wife , smack in the head. And we have the pictures of a mystery woman in his inbox to prove it.
His hacked email account has revealed another filthy layer of Bashar’s carniverous carnage. And this time, he’s on his own. Apparently while his troops were bombing Homs, the Dude may have had a special lady friend on the side. A racy photo and a flirtatious back and forth between the two reveal a possible relationship.
Those among us, who are shocked by this, throw the first stone! Just as we thought, no one is coming forward. For indeed we all knew that a person who sanctions mass killing would not find it a problem to cheat on..
His wife?!! That first of Ladies to stand by her man! She’s coming forward, with tears in her eyes and a big rock in her hand,
“I am shocked! Yes me, his partner, his best friend. Bashar, I cannot believe, after I stuck with you through everything, you would thank me in this way. I even stood silent when you trashed Homs, my hometown, just like your father did to Hama some 30 years ago! My childhood memories were of playing in his rubble and now, my marriage is shambles and dust as well!”
The reality of it all is that Assad probably thought he could get away with it. It looks like the lion is soon to be tamed because if these emails are true, this circus is about to get exciting. With the wrath of a thousand grieving Syrian mothers and families already cracking their whips, the last thing he needed was an angry lioness sharing his lair. Welcome to the jungle Lyin’ King, and the first of many nights on the couch.
By Brett Weer.