Dastardly deeds and plots gone askew: the Mideast's comedy criminals exposed

Published January 17th, 2013 - 13:38 GMT

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To much of the western world, the Middle East is seen as a dangerous region with serious crimes and terrorist activity that make it a threat to itself and the rest of the world.

But we've uncovered a lighter side to the villainy in the region that is less Bin Laden, more Bugsy Malone.

Last year, the Mideast’s miscreants tried their best to dodge the law by making their criminal plans weirder and wackier than ever before.

From turbocharged panties to snakes on a plane, confused cops across the region were left scratching their heads over criminal capers that seemed too bizarre to believe.

But the plots of these dastardly deviants soon went awry as attempts to smuggle amo in nappies were foiled by border police and the Thelma and Louise style Gulfi girl gang got arrested.

Here are some of the best criminal cock-ups the region has to offer. Continue reading below »

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Snakes on a plane! Real, live and at their venomous best. There was no Hollywood plotline when an Egyptian prankster hid the serpents on a flight to Kuwait. His victim? A fellow Arab passenger who got quite a shock when the snake attacked him.
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Image 1 of 12:  1 / 12Snakes on a plane! Real, live and at their venomous best. There was no Hollywood plotline when an Egyptian prankster hid the serpents on a flight to Kuwait. His victim? A fellow Arab passenger who got quite a shock when the snake attacked him.

Enlarge
Say cheese! A crafty Arab duo were stopped in their tracks in Dubai after creating quite the stink with their plan to hide heroin and hashish in boxes full of cheese. The pair managed to smuggle nearly 20g of drugs in the cheddar.
Reduce

Image 2 of 12:  2 / 12Say cheese! A crafty Arab duo were stopped in their tracks in Dubai after creating quite the stink with their plan to hide heroin and hashish in boxes full of cheese. The pair managed to smuggle nearly 20g of drugs in the cheddar.

Enlarge
A fiendishly festive plot: Saudi police were quick to stop this dastardly deed from ever happening but.. shock! Some of their fellow countrymen were planning to celebrate Christmas. Would-be-Grinches everywhere rejoiced as the guilty house was stormed.
Reduce

Image 3 of 12:  3 / 12A fiendishly festive plot: Saudi police were quick to stop this dastardly deed from ever happening but.. shock! Some of their fellow countrymen were planning to celebrate Christmas. Would-be-Grinches everywhere rejoiced as the guilty house was stormed.

Enlarge
Turbocharged panties: not just any old underwear would do for this scheming businessman who smuggled plane fuel to the UAE in high-end lingerie. But it wasn’t a Victoria Secret for long when U.S. authorities busted him at the airport.
Reduce

Image 4 of 12:  4 / 12Turbocharged panties: not just any old underwear would do for this scheming businessman who smuggled plane fuel to the UAE in high-end lingerie. But it wasn’t a Victoria Secret for long when U.S. authorities busted him at the airport.

Enlarge
They must have had cows for brains! Caught offal-handed in Egypt, these Sudanese smugglers had their plans to sell cow brains to local restaurants at Eid-al-Adha foiled by a crime-fighting team at Cairo International Airport.
Reduce

Image 5 of 12:  5 / 12They must have had cows for brains! Caught offal-handed in Egypt, these Sudanese smugglers had their plans to sell cow brains to local restaurants at Eid-al-Adha foiled by a crime-fighting team at Cairo International Airport.

Enlarge
Thelma and Louise reborn in the UAE: This feisty Gulfi-girl-gang didn’t stand a chance when police arrested them for robbing apartments in Sharjah. But unlike the real-life criminal duo, these Arab ladies surrendered to the law and confessed to their capers.
Reduce

Image 6 of 12:  6 / 12Thelma and Louise reborn in the UAE: This feisty Gulfi-girl-gang didn’t stand a chance when police arrested them for robbing apartments in Sharjah. But unlike the real-life criminal duo, these Arab ladies surrendered to the law and confessed to their capers.

Enlarge
Even the Sheikhs are at it! Not even God himself could stop these cheeky crooks from facing the wrath of the Lebanese law after their “chocolate-making machines” were stopped at the border. Turns out they were more useful for making coke than cocoa.
Reduce

Image 7 of 12:  7 / 12Even the Sheikhs are at it! Not even God himself could stop these cheeky crooks from facing the wrath of the Lebanese law after their “chocolate-making machines” were stopped at the border. Turns out they were more useful for making coke than cocoa.

Enlarge
Drive of shame: A bit of “innocent” hanky-panky in the back of a Dubai taxi turned into a serious criminal affair after sexpats Becky Blake and her “fiancé” were caught with their pants down in the glitzy emirate. The pair did their walk of shame in the UAE’s court.
Reduce

Image 8 of 12:  8 / 12Drive of shame: A bit of “innocent” hanky-panky in the back of a Dubai taxi turned into a serious criminal affair after sexpats Becky Blake and her “fiancé” were caught with their pants down in the glitzy emirate. The pair did their walk of shame in the UAE’s court.

Enlarge
Soggy diapers all round? Yemen’s customs authorities came upon a real stinker when they found containers loaded with gun parts, disguised as baby diapers. The culprits escaped and police were left scratching their heads.
Reduce

Image 9 of 12:  9 / 12Soggy diapers all round? Yemen’s customs authorities came upon a real stinker when they found containers loaded with gun parts, disguised as baby diapers. The culprits escaped and police were left scratching their heads.

Enlarge
Hold-up! Did Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid leave Bolivia in search of the Middle East? These dastardly Abu Dhabi bank robbers certainly seemed like the real deal but managed to pull off the deed without guns or masks when they distracted customers at the counter.
Reduce

Image 10 of 12:  10 / 12Hold-up! Did Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid leave Bolivia in search of the Middle East? These dastardly Abu Dhabi bank robbers certainly seemed like the real deal but managed to pull off the deed without guns or masks when they distracted customers at the counter.

Enlarge
Daring to date in Saudi? You must be mad! One man’s madcap scheme to find a Jewish wife at the Muslim holy site of Meccah caused quite a stir among the authorities. Police were so baffled they didn’t know whether to sling him in jail or find him a doctor.
Reduce

Image 11 of 12:  11 / 12Daring to date in Saudi? You must be mad! One man’s madcap scheme to find a Jewish wife at the Muslim holy site of Meccah caused quite a stir among the authorities. Police were so baffled they didn’t know whether to sling him in jail or find him a doctor.

Enlarge
Pimp that ride! One Saudi stud, too sexy for his shirt, decided to sell himself off with a car ad to draw in the ladies’ attention. But the Kingdom’s religious police had other ideas for this wannabe gigolo and tracked him down to the vehicle.
Reduce

Image 12 of 12:  12 / 12Pimp that ride! One Saudi stud, too sexy for his shirt, decided to sell himself off with a car ad to draw in the ladies’ attention. But the Kingdom’s religious police had other ideas for this wannabe gigolo and tracked him down to the vehicle.

Enlarge

1

Snakes on a plane! Real, live and at their venomous best. There was no Hollywood plotline when an Egyptian prankster hid the serpents on a flight to Kuwait. His victim? A fellow Arab passenger who got quite a shock when the snake attacked him.

Image 1 of 12Snakes on a plane! Real, live and at their venomous best. There was no Hollywood plotline when an Egyptian prankster hid the serpents on a flight to Kuwait. His victim? A fellow Arab passenger who got quite a shock when the snake attacked him.

2

Say cheese! A crafty Arab duo were stopped in their tracks in Dubai after creating quite the stink with their plan to hide heroin and hashish in boxes full of cheese. The pair managed to smuggle nearly 20g of drugs in the cheddar.

Image 2 of 12Say cheese! A crafty Arab duo were stopped in their tracks in Dubai after creating quite the stink with their plan to hide heroin and hashish in boxes full of cheese. The pair managed to smuggle nearly 20g of drugs in the cheddar.

3

A fiendishly festive plot: Saudi police were quick to stop this dastardly deed from ever happening but.. shock! Some of their fellow countrymen were planning to celebrate Christmas. Would-be-Grinches everywhere rejoiced as the guilty house was stormed.

Image 3 of 12A fiendishly festive plot: Saudi police were quick to stop this dastardly deed from ever happening but.. shock! Some of their fellow countrymen were planning to celebrate Christmas. Would-be-Grinches everywhere rejoiced as the guilty house was stormed.

4

Turbocharged panties: not just any old underwear would do for this scheming businessman who smuggled plane fuel to the UAE in high-end lingerie. But it wasn’t a Victoria Secret for long when U.S. authorities busted him at the airport.

Image 4 of 12Turbocharged panties: not just any old underwear would do for this scheming businessman who smuggled plane fuel to the UAE in high-end lingerie. But it wasn’t a Victoria Secret for long when U.S. authorities busted him at the airport.

5

They must have had cows for brains! Caught offal-handed in Egypt, these Sudanese smugglers had their plans to sell cow brains to local restaurants at Eid-al-Adha foiled by a crime-fighting team at Cairo International Airport.

Image 5 of 12They must have had cows for brains! Caught offal-handed in Egypt, these Sudanese smugglers had their plans to sell cow brains to local restaurants at Eid-al-Adha foiled by a crime-fighting team at Cairo International Airport.

6

Thelma and Louise reborn in the UAE: This feisty Gulfi-girl-gang didn’t stand a chance when police arrested them for robbing apartments in Sharjah. But unlike the real-life criminal duo, these Arab ladies surrendered to the law and confessed to their capers.

Image 6 of 12Thelma and Louise reborn in the UAE: This feisty Gulfi-girl-gang didn’t stand a chance when police arrested them for robbing apartments in Sharjah. But unlike the real-life criminal duo, these Arab ladies surrendered to the law and confessed to their capers.

7

Even the Sheikhs are at it! Not even God himself could stop these cheeky crooks from facing the wrath of the Lebanese law after their “chocolate-making machines” were stopped at the border. Turns out they were more useful for making coke than cocoa.

Image 7 of 12Even the Sheikhs are at it! Not even God himself could stop these cheeky crooks from facing the wrath of the Lebanese law after their “chocolate-making machines” were stopped at the border. Turns out they were more useful for making coke than cocoa.

8

Drive of shame: A bit of “innocent” hanky-panky in the back of a Dubai taxi turned into a serious criminal affair after sexpats Becky Blake and her “fiancé” were caught with their pants down in the glitzy emirate. The pair did their walk of shame in the UAE’s court.

Image 8 of 12Drive of shame: A bit of “innocent” hanky-panky in the back of a Dubai taxi turned into a serious criminal affair after sexpats Becky Blake and her “fiancé” were caught with their pants down in the glitzy emirate. The pair did their walk of shame in the UAE’s court.

9

Soggy diapers all round? Yemen’s customs authorities came upon a real stinker when they found containers loaded with gun parts, disguised as baby diapers. The culprits escaped and police were left scratching their heads.

Image 9 of 12Soggy diapers all round? Yemen’s customs authorities came upon a real stinker when they found containers loaded with gun parts, disguised as baby diapers. The culprits escaped and police were left scratching their heads.

10

Hold-up! Did Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid leave Bolivia in search of the Middle East? These dastardly Abu Dhabi bank robbers certainly seemed like the real deal but managed to pull off the deed without guns or masks when they distracted customers at the counter.

Image 10 of 12Hold-up! Did Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid leave Bolivia in search of the Middle East? These dastardly Abu Dhabi bank robbers certainly seemed like the real deal but managed to pull off the deed without guns or masks when they distracted customers at the counter.

11

Daring to date in Saudi? You must be mad! One man’s madcap scheme to find a Jewish wife at the Muslim holy site of Meccah caused quite a stir among the authorities. Police were so baffled they didn’t know whether to sling him in jail or find him a doctor.

Image 11 of 12Daring to date in Saudi? You must be mad! One man’s madcap scheme to find a Jewish wife at the Muslim holy site of Meccah caused quite a stir among the authorities. Police were so baffled they didn’t know whether to sling him in jail or find him a doctor.

12

Pimp that ride! One Saudi stud, too sexy for his shirt, decided to sell himself off with a car ad to draw in the ladies’ attention. But the Kingdom’s religious police had other ideas for this wannabe gigolo and tracked him down to the vehicle.

Image 12 of 12Pimp that ride! One Saudi stud, too sexy for his shirt, decided to sell himself off with a car ad to draw in the ladies’ attention. But the Kingdom’s religious police had other ideas for this wannabe gigolo and tracked him down to the vehicle.

Reduce

 

Is the Middle East just a region of wars and terror? Or does it have a lighter side? Tell us what you think below. 

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