Mother-to-be: Hubby Refuses Sex During Pregnancy Because Baby Might Tell What's Happening

Published June 12th, 2018 - 05:00 GMT
(Shutterstock/File Photo)
(Shutterstock/File Photo)

A mother-to-be has revealed her husband refuses to have sex with her while she is expecting.

Writing on Mumsnet, the British woman, who is 18 weeks pregnant, explained her partner claims it would be 'wrong' because their unborn baby might be able to tell what is happening.

However his decision has left her feeling 'ugly and unattractive'. She asked: 'AIBU [am I being unreasonable] to be gutted by this?'

The post divided opinion on the online forum, with some agreeing that they would be frustrated if they were in her position. However others argued she was the one who was being unreasonable for placing the expectation on her husband.

She wrote: 'DP won't have sex even though I'm only 18 weeks. Says he's not comfortable with it as he thinks baby can tell.

'I've told him otherwise and shown him the research to go with it. We haven't had sex since baby was conceived as he thinks it is "wrong". He won't look at me and I just feel ugly and unattractive.

'I'm not saying he has to have sex with me, of course. Nobody should do anything they aren't comfortable with. AIBU however to be gutted by this? 9 months of no sex and then some.

'I'm considering ordering from love honey as if he ain't giving it to me then I'll do it myself!'

One sympathetic woman wrote: 'If he truly loved and fancied you he wouldn't stop wanting to make love. Some of the best sex was during my pregnancies.'

Another said: 'You are not being unreasonable. I was rampant when I was pregnant, couldn't get enough much to darling partner's delight. Obviously we were gentle and careful but it was a really special time for us and he loved my changing body and bump... I would feel upset about losing closeness for so long.'



Some suggested ways she might be able to help reassure her husband.

One posted: 'Maybe your DH [darling husband] might feel differently if you get the doctor or midwife to reassure him. Alternatively show him this thread. I'm not surprised you're upset. It's horrible to feel your dearest husband doesn't find you attractive.'

Another suggested: 'Maybe wear a baggy t shirt/ sexy nightie to camouflage your bump? Out of sight, out of mind?'

However she came under fire from other users who slammed her for questioning her husband's feelings in the situation.

One person said: 'You are being unreasonable, if he doesn't want to have sex then you should respect that. I found it bizarre when I was pregnant and we didn't have sex at all! Luckily my husband didn't question me.'

Another warned it could be a sign of future trouble.

They wrote: 'No one should feel obliged to have sex just because their partner wants it, obviously. But a man who goes off sex when his wife is pregnant... that can be an indicator of long term trouble ahead...'

The mother-to-be later shared a second post clarifying that she was not forcing her husband to have sex.


This article has been adapted from its original source.

© Associated Newspapers Ltd.

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