By Hazem Tarawneh
I did not realize that for the past four years, and since I started my immigration journey to the west, I have been on a mission to answer an unplanned and unintentional question; I mean, I am familiar with the question, but I never took it seriously, nor was I ever interested in hearing or finding an answer!
Who am I?
I knew my skin color and the culture associated with it, but I never considered it part of my identity! I thought I was beyond this as an individual because I had other important aspects to show, which is not irresponsible to believe.
I was intentionally trying to release myself from all the ties and social obligations. I saw it as a heavy liability I did not want to carry or defend. I also knew it would not help me in my new context; it would only put more unnecessary barriers, and it was not my battle! After all, the “Orientalism” theory is not valid in the time of Bitcoin and TikTok.
I claim that my journey was rich with experiences and knowledge that helped reintroduce that question, and I found myself very eager to answer it!
When you decide to release yourself from all ties, you have no choice but to belong to the “all” which is not a bad idea; on the contrary, it is what you should be doing in the end. But you need to know yourself well first and be aware of that decision!
In other words, we have been told it is not recommended intellectually to mentally practice your belonging to a specific identity, especially when it is a small ethnic group. Still, you should belong to the bigger groups such as nationality!
However, we then learn that we inherit our people's knowledge and consciousness in our genes ... It is our memory that we are definitely not limited to, but also try to expand; in some cases distance from it but celebrate it in others!
A Bedouin is a poet! A Viking is a sailor deep inside! You cannot and should not run from that genetic identity! It is old, rich, generational, cumulative, and has lots of knowledge on how to perceive life and act, it also comes with its own problems and traumas.
I am not inviting anyone here to identify themselves with that genetic memory but to have it in the back of their head because it can be an essential part of the heart and soul.
If you were able to find the most defined particular community, small or big, and it was valid to claim to belong to them, it will help you learn about your deep self-better and your potential as a human.
It will help you to be more conscious of that consciousness you have in your genes! If you are mixed, then you have a unique mixed kind of consciousness! You are different for sure, and you have a bit of both! We inherit how we preserve life, but we are always on a mission to be aware of how we do that, then we need to expand it! Evolution!
The older you go to find your community, it can be the deepest you know about inner self; I am originally from Jordan, and I love to believe that there is a high chance that I am Nabatean Jordanian; of the people who carved a city in the face of a red sandstone rock! How magnificent!
Hazem Tarawneh is a writer based in Vancouver works in tech.
