Living by the Caliphate's fanatical fatwas: 13 of Daesh's most ridiculous restrictive rulings

Published March 24th, 2015 - 02:39 GMT

Daesh released approximately 70 new regulations in 2015, an array of “fatwas” [religious edicts]  that range from sublimely silly to riotously ridiculous. The new rules aim to guide jihadis in righteous living, including bizarre considerations such as when it’s acceptable for women to bleach their eyebrows and guidance on when billiard-playing men can swear.

While fatwas have been historically associated with Shia society, Saudi sheikhs have also issued their fair share of religious decrees. These 13 fatwas are fortunately not legally binding beyond the scope of Daesh’s self-proclaimed caliphate.

The decrees provide a unique glimpse into life under their oppressive control. Often surreal, the rules stem from Daesh’s own Sharia Council, to whom even their Rolex-sporting gang leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi reports.

Most are highly bureaucratic, defining how to calculate the percentage of looted bounty to be returned to terror group officials, and forbidding fighters from ever leaving Daesh territory. Others are horrific, like the fatwa describing their organ harvesting scheme. That one says, “the lives and organs of apostates are fundamentally licit. Their organs may be taken, whether or not the apostates are alive or already dead, and whether or not doing so results in their death.” Ouch!

With absolute reverence and respect to their victims, we believe there’s no fatwa on funny where Daesh is concerned. There is often no better way to deflate Daesh dominance than by poking fun at these demons.

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