Bella Thorne Questions if All She Has to Offer to The World is Sex

Published August 21st, 2019 - 09:18 GMT
Bella previously discussed being abused in another poem from her book
Bella previously discussed being abused in another poem from her book
Highlights
Bella Thorne reveals she has been 'molested her whole life'

Bella Thorne spoke frankly about her history of abuse in a poignant Instagram post on Tuesday.

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Addressing her troubled past, the former Disney Channel actress, 21, revealed she was 'molested her whole life', and revealed the trauma had left her with a 'need for validation'.  

Alongside a series of topless images, Bella questioned if having been 'exposed to sex at such a young age', if that's all she could 'offer' to the world.  

Candid: Bella Thorne spoke frankly about her history of abuse in a poignant Instagram post on Tuesday. The former Disney Channel actress, 21, revealed she was 'molested her whole life'

'What is wrong with me? Why do I always need Validation from everyone but mostly men... [sic]' she started. 

Bella - who is dating singer Benjamin Mascolo - then appeared to address her current relationship, as she mused: 'Everyone keeps telling me to be single, be alone, and make your self happy. 

'But All those things sound so f***ing scary to me. all I want is him. I want him to hold me, I want him to love me, I want him to tell me it's ok, I want him to look me in the eyes and let me know I'm accepted. [sic]'

 

 

She continued: 'Why? Because I can't accept myself. For some reason in my head I'm just not f***ing good enough. Not good enough for him or Her or anyone else. 

'And if it's not him I just look for the 'next' him, or her Why can't I just look for the next me? Find me and accept me [sic].'

'Was it because I was molested my whole life,' she wondered.

'Exposed to sex at such a young age it's all I know how to offer to the world...or is it because I was raised to think I wasn't good enough. Not good enough for her or anything else.' 

Bella went on to admit that she blames herself for the way she has in acted in the wake of the abuse, revealing that she is going to work on her self esteem. 

She continued: 'But it doesn't matter what happened to me.. What matters is whats happening to me right now. I can't blame my childhood, in fact I can't blame anyone for anything.  

'All I can do is blame me. I blame me for not loving myself. I blame me for not thinking I'm attractive, I blame me for putting this on everyone around me. Expecting people to love me enough for me to love myself. 

'But at the end of the day that will never happen. Because the only way to get to your end goal is to work through it. Not around or above or try and find a cheat code so you don't have to hurt as much.

'You have to hurt in this world. Hurting, loving, and accepting. That's what our emotional world lays on. Right now I only have one of those things. Can you guess what it is? Hurting. Right now I only hurt...but I'm not hurting for other people no I'm only hurting myself. By not loving me and by not accepting me. [sic]'

She concluded: 'This poem is about mommy and daddy and me and you [sic]'.

Shocking past: Bella previously discussed being abused in another poem from her book, The Life Of A Wannabe Mogul: Mental Disarray

Bella previously discussed being abused in another poem from her book, The Life Of A Wannabe Mogul: Mental Disarray.

'He didn't have to deal with the countless times he molested me, / he didn't deal with the countless times I felt ashamed or disgusting,' she wrote.

Last year, the Shake It Up star tagged #TimesUp in an Instagram post, where she discussed being abused as a child. 

Bella revealed: 'I was sexually abused and physically growing up from the day I can remember till I was 14, when I finally had the courage to lock my door at night and sit by it.'

'Over and over I waited for it to stop and finally it did. But some of us aren't as lucky to get out alive,' she said.

 

 


© Associated Newspapers Ltd.

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