If you think this is just another article preaching toxic positivity then please give me a chance to prove you wrong. We all go through our share of pain, loss and grief, and we have every right to sit with our feelings and feel them. However, honoring your feelings and having them completely drown you are two very different things. That is why it is important to understand what optimism really is and how we can practice it in a healthy manner and make sure we do not normalize the toxicity it can entail.
Before we get into what optimism is really about, it is pivotal to highlight how positivity and optimism are different. Positivity has more to do with being in denial and blindly believing that everything is okay and good, even when that isn’t true. Whereas optimism revolves around having a belief system that acknowledges and accepts that things may not be the best right now, but there is still hope that they can get better.
And while some might argue that the “fake it till you make it approach can work with being happy and positive, what it really does is push people to bury their feelings in a healthy and toxic manner.
“Positivity is blind. Optimism is the undying belief that the future is bright, but it’s not a denial of the current state.” - Simon Sinek, British-American Author and Inspirational Speaker
If you break down optimism and get to its very core, you can see that there is also much more to it than just looking at the bright side. Being optimistic has to do with visiting old thinking patterns, developing new healthier habits, and finding the right tools to help you grow through challenging times. But what most people do not know is the fact that 25% of optimism can be inherited, which means some of us already have a head start! However, even those who haven't inherited it, do not worry because there is always room for improvement and growing a more resilient and optimistic mindset.
The good news is that optimism is a skill that can be nurtured as much as it is a deep rooted belief. And because of its a belief that can help us perceive the future in a brighter lens, being optimistic entails many different benefits. Research has shown that optimism is associated with better cardiovascular health, stronger immune system and healthier relationships.
One study even reports that women who were more optimistic were 30% less likely to die from a serious illness, like cancer and strokes. Not only that but optimism also has a significant impact on the mental wellbeing of people. Practicing optimism can help improve a person’s ability to adapt, improve their cognitive and problem-solving capacities, as well as help them progress further in life.
So the question that many might be wondering about, is how can one develop an optimistic mindset? While there is no one shoe that fits all, here are some ways that can help!
- Take a look at those you surround yourself with
As cliché and overused as it may sound, the people you surround yourself with contribute greatly to how you feel and think. One of my good friends, Dareen Kotob, who also happens to be an Emotional Fitness Coach, always tells me that emotions are actually energy in motion. And if you think about it, that is very true because emotions can be contagious! So make sure you surround yourself with people who radiate good energy, thoughts and emotions.
- Declutter your mind
Writing down your thoughts, or even saying them out loud can help you ALOT! It is important that you do not keep everything trapped inside your mind. Talking about things or journaling can help you see things from a different perspective and even make things seem lighter.
- Practice gratitude
I personally believe that practicing gratitude is a superpower that can help create wonders! With the many stressors flowing our way, sometimes getting lost and ignoring the bigger picture is easy. It is even reported that practicing gratitude is linked to higher levels of optimism.
That is why it is instrumental that you take a minute or two each day to remind yourself of what you are grateful for. It can be the small things, drinking your favorite coffee, watching the sunset, or in my case having a really yummy and juicy mango!
- Acknowledge and accept ALL your feelings
Feelings are feelings, and they have to be acknowledged and dealt with. Whether you are feeling sad, happy or going through a challenging time, it is crucial that you honor your feelings and take your time with them.
A huge part of being optimistic is learning that life is not all rainbows and butterflies, and that knowing how to deal with the downs is just as important as knowing how to deal with the ups. Do not look at optimism as a way to lock out difficult feelings, but instead use it as a way to accept your current state and also be hopeful and optimistic about what the future holds.
Optimism is a skill that can be harnessed so that you can stand in the midst of adversity and say, I know I am going through a difficult time, and things are tough. But I also have faith that things will get better.”
With March being the Official Optimism Month, start training your optimism muscle and have faith in a better and brighter future! ?
